He Doesnt' Love You Enough...

Disclaimer: I did not write this piece. But it's just so inspiring that I decided to post it here. It's Ivy's fault. Haha! Anyway, this is for all my girlfriends..

Bato bato sa langit, tamaan ay 'wag magalit....sige, di na ko magagalit.. ;)

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He calls, he tells me he misses me, asks me out often, is relentlessly sweet and thoughtful. I am always on cloud nine and unapologetically unable to wipe the grin off my face. I am in love with him and although he hasn't said so yet, I am sure he loves me back. Herein lies the tragedy.

With men, until he hasn’t asked you to be his girlfriend, you are not on safe ground. No matter how few the minutes are between his text messages or his phone calls, even if he has tried to hold your hand, carefully picked off the eyelash from under your eye, and wiped the crumb that was perched on your upper lip, assume that he just wants to be friends. Assume otherwise and you’ll be in for a great big heartbreak.

When faced with the same given in the same situation, no matter where they come from, they will all do the same thing. Enter the questions women love to ask:

(1) Why hasn’t he called me the past few days?

(2) If he likes being with me so much, why doesn't he leave his girlfriend/wife for me?

There is just one answer to all these questions: he doesn’t love you enough.

He hasn’t left his girlfriend or his wife for you. Sometimes men are looking for icing on the cake in the form of a woman friend who plugs in all the gap that his better half cannot fill. She is usually somebody with slightly different qualities than his mate. He enjoys being with her, calls her all the time, consults with her about life-altering decisions but does not really come out and make a decision about who he wants to be with simply because he is in a “safe place."

He has the best of both worlds and doesn’t need to make a choice. If he hasn’t left her for you yet, chances are, he won’t. Telltale signs: she is still his priority. When she calls and asks him to pick her up, he hurriedly finishes his meal and tells you that he has to go. When you ask him out on days when he has to take her home, he’ll say he can’t.

You notice that you are only together when his schedule permits it and when seeing you don’t conflict with his time with her. You get the crumbs.

This kind of arrangement only tells you that he doesn’t love you enough to forsake his girlfriend for you. If he takes a chance by leaving her for you, you’re sure that he loves you. Most men would stay with the safe, the tried and tested over risking everything. It takes a lot for them to, believe me.

Obviously, you don’t want to be second best or the pangtawid-gutom. Find someone who will make you his only priority. Although they pretend and seem otherwise, men are not idiots when it comes to matters of the heart. They know full well what they want out of the relationship. They do not need to be rescued by you. They don’t need hints, carefully crafted text messages or highway billboards that promise them a bed of roses with you. If they really like you, they will do anything to get you to like them back.

***author unknown***

Fear..

Grey's Anatomy gave me so many words and lines to think about...subconsciously, most of the people who are avid viewers of the show live with the hope that these scripts or lines or narrations are true.

Two lines are running in my mind right now...one came from Izzie Stevens.

"Just because people do horrible things, it doesn't always mean they're horrible people"

..think about that. If YOU are reading this right now (I know you are coz you read my blogs..), I just want you to know that I don't think you're horrible. What you did or are doing may not be right but YOU will always have a choice and I know you'll do the right thing eventually.

"It's good to be scared. It means you still have something to lose" (Richard Webber)

...I'm scared now. I'm scared of what the future will hold me. And I don't really know if this line is appropriate but it stung me awhile ago. I have so many fears right now. Shallow fears actually...fears that someday I will overcome...fears that will one day disappear because we simply get immuned to the thought of being afraid....until we become numb...until we realize that we may have lost something or someone...but we will live. Because there's nothing else we can do..but live.

goodnight....

Valentines Day Scrooge

Disclaimer: To those who don't want their Valentine spirit to be ruined. Do not read beyond this point.

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I've never been a fan of this day. Actually, if I would choose a day to scrap out of the calendar, it would be the ever famous February 14. I don't mean to sound bitter just because I'm single. In fact, even when I was in a relationship, Valentines day was one of the days when my ex-boyfriend and I would pick a really big fight. So there. I should actually be thankful now that I am saved from the hassle of having to experience the long line of cues in the restos or having to do early reservations to whatever place I want to go to...or experience the heavy traffic jam (just because it's a payday week too and everybody -- single or in a relationship -- would want to celebrate their joy of love or lack of it). I am saved from the emotional stress of having to fight over the fact that men don't really like celebrating this day.

For me, love should be celebrated everyday!! Don't you think so? So instead of moping around and spreading my hateful attitude towards this day to the people around me, I've decided to just treat this day as if it were just a normal day.

To those who woke me up early in the morning just to greet me, thank you. I appreciate all the sweet stuff that some people sent me. But I hope you're not expecting any special attention today because I'd gladly give you a hug or a kiss or a sweet gesture anytime of the week, month or year...I promise!!!

And just to clear things up, I love falling in love!! I love the thought of one day telling him and showing him the kind of love that I'm capable of giving. Not just on Valentines Day but everyday of my existence. =)

So to those who are in love, who are out of love, who are hurt by love, and who are searching for love, I wish you not just a Happy Valentines Day but a happy life full of love that everybody deserves...

Turning Into A Japanese Biker Chick..

I am currently recuperating from a looong and tiring weekend. I hosted the Yamaha Evolution 2008 event at the Mall of Asia last Thursday until Sunday. Four days of heat, sweat, motorcycles, and Japanese immersion.

Let's backtrack a little bit: Uchi, Bamboo's gorgeous booking manager, gave me a call a few weeks back and asked me if I was available to host for simple event that didn't require that much energy because it was mostly voice overs and repetitive spiels. Hmmm...the thought was very promising...voice overs for four days wasn't that bad, right? To make the long story short, I was endorsed to a guy named Jude and we closed the deal.

8:30am, Thursday, I drove to Mall of Asia so I could reach the agreed calltime of 10:00am. Traffic was frikkin bad!! I was 15minutes late. Spiels weren't ready. The parking lot set-up was not yet done. The place was full of these dreaded motorcycles. I was wearing my red, 4-inch stilettos and I had to walk a kilometer to reach the agreed meeting place. This is just great.

11:00am, the Japanese bosses called for a meeting. This is the first time that I will be working with Japanese folks so I was a little intimidated and nervous. I heard that they had very high standards and they were the most hard-working and dedicated people in the planet. That made me all the more jittery. Introductions were made, and I had the chance to meet the people that I would be working with for the next four days.

12noon. We officially opened the gates for the test ride and student riding activities. My spiels were basic and simple. All I needed to do was to invite everybody to come and visit the area and have a free test drive of the new motorcycle models. I had to say those spiels every 15 minutes (except during the student riding sessions...I once forgot that the sessions have started, next thing I knew, 4 Japanese guys shushed me...it was kinda embarrassing)

Motorcycles. They've always brought shivers down my spine. I was never a motorcycle freak. For me, owning a motorcycle was inviting danger. It was mind-boggling for me to find almost a hundred people falling in line just to test drive a motorcycle....so, just to find out why a lot of people love the thrill and the action of riding something so dangerous, I decided to give it a try. After 10 minutes of trying to keep my balance, and of mistaking the accelerator with the brakes, I decided to quit. I'll just stick to hosting.

7:00pm. We called it a day and started packing up. I decided to hang at the new Pier One By The Bay first before going home. I didn't want to get stuck in a 2-hour traffic jam so I chatted with the owners and savored some bacon asparagus (try it, it's mouth-watering!!) This branch was by far my favorite hang out place. It's right across the parking lot of the IMAX theater. Looove it!!!

I was dead tired. I thought voice overs were easy. I guess if you keep on saying the same things all over again a gazillion times a day under the frikkin heat, it really will make you tired.


Friday was easier. There were more people but we kinda got into the groove of the event so things went smoothly. I was amazed with how the Japanese worked. I had so much spare time observing the people around me and it was a really great experience for me to be working with these guys. For one, they were such neat freaks! They were so organized, and they followed the schedule by the dot. I was really impressed.

Ogura, one of the bosses was the strictest..and funniest. It was him that I was trying to impress. By the end of the day, I was learning a lot about Japanese culture.

Saturday was the day of the Bamboo concert. I was tired as hell. But it was well worth it because by this time, the people that I've worked with for 2 whole days have become my friends already. They were really cool people. To cut the long story short, I stayed til the end of the concert.

I had a mixture of emotions last Sunday as I was driving to the Mall of Asia for my last day. Part of me was relieved because it's almost over. But part of me was also sad that this was going to be the last day that I'd be seeing the people that I've grown fond of. I'm gunna miss the guys with the Japanese accent telling me "miss, pris announce da nex sessiong en ter dem to fir up registrationg forngm!" I'm gunna miss the yosi breaks and the IMAX restrooms. I'm gunna miss the motorcycles and the mishaps of the wannabe-bikers who pretend that they know how to ride a bike but end up hurting themselves and crashing the new Yamaha bikes. I'm gunna miss a particularly strange person who I grew fond of for the past four days....

I'm back to work now. But somehow, my four-day experience will remain in my brain for a looong time. Motorcycles don't make me queasy anymore. They give me a sense of euphoria. Because every time I see one now, I will forever remember the people and the experience of last weekend. =)


P.S. ---> I've created new memories with my favorite Starbucks White Chocolate Mocha. *wink*